You will regret your decision for the rest of your life.
Making an adoption plan can be very positive. You are making a loving decision that you feel is best for you and for your child.
My child will hate me and think I'm a bad person.
You have given your child the gift of life and made an unselfish decision by choosing adoption. You have the opportunity to share that with your child by writing a letter explaining your decision. Your child will grow up knowing that you loved him.
Adopted Children have problems.
Adopted children do well in life. A research study showed that 50% of adopted youth said they were as happy as their peers while 38% rated themselves as happier. In another research study, adopted adolescents scored positively in self-esteem and self-identity. In yet another study, adopted adolescents scored higher on characteristics of well-being and lower on characteristics of high-risk behavior when compared to their peers.
I will have to say goodbye to my child and never know how they are doing.
You have the opportunity to receive updates about your child and the adoptive family. You can receive pictures and letters from the adoptive family. You can also send the adoptive family updates about yourself. You may also have the opportunity to visit your child and adoptive family. Adoption is not a forever goodbye.
Expectant moms who place their babies for adoption are abandoning their responsibility and taking the easy way out.
Those who choose adoption do so after carefully considering their options and the best interests of their child. Adoption is a courageous, loving choice which shows that the birth mother takes seriously the responsibility to be a parent. They are putting the child’s needs before their own, which is no easy way out.
An adoptive parent cannot love a child as much as a biological parent can.
Love is not based on biology. Many loving relationships are between people who aren’t blood-related to each other, such as husbands and wives. The love of a parent comes from preparing for a child and selflessly nurturing and caring for that child.
Birthmothers will always struggle with the emotional pain of placing a child for adoption.
Birthmothers who choose adoption do experience grief, which is a normal response. Our trained staff is here to help you process your emotions in a healthy way. Many birthmothers tell us they find peace in knowing that their child is happy, healthy, and loved by the adoptive family they chose. In addition, most birthmothers find that the experience actually gives them strength and confidence to face other challenges throughout their lives.
The adoption process should be a secret.
Years ago, adoption was closed and it was believed that it was best for all involved to keep the process a secret. Studies have shown that there are benefits for the birthmother, the adoptive family, and most importantly, the child, which is why adoption today offers greater levels of openness. In fact, a child’s adoption story is shared with him from day one, in age-appropriate ways that stress love and permanence.